Not wanting to be UNgrateful

Thankful Thursday: 

When I pause to think of something I’m thankful for…

When it’s rainy and drismal…

When those glorious leaves are being stripped from the trees.

When nothing great or exciting is at the forefront of my mind to be giddy about…

Yes, then I pause.

Because I want to cultivate the practice of gratitude.

I choose to notice - and even search if necessary.

Yes, I’m thankful for a cozy house. And for an un-busy schedule so I don’t have to be out and about nor bother with an umbrella or sensible footwear.  I’m thankful to be safe and comfortable in my own house.

But then I think of so many who are not.

And then my heart hurts and my eyes drip.

I wonder why I am so fortunate.

So blessed.

I wonder how I can bless others.

How can I make a difference in a world of violence and oppression and injustice?

It feels weird… petty… insensitive… to regale the things for which I am thankful when those things are unavailable to so many across the globe.  

But then again, to NOT be grateful for my blessings would be so… ungrateful.

Like a spoiled selfish child. 

Such an ingrate.

So I keep reminding myself to notice…

• Blessings
• Flickers of hope
• Ideas for how to help others
• People who make a difference

Thankful Thursday: feeling good

Thankful Thursday: Today I'm thankful that I feel good.  Like when you don't feel so great for a few days, and then start feeling like yourself again.  And it just feels SO good to feel good again.

My sickness wasn't terrible.  (I feel thankful for that, too!). I just didn't feel great - and I may have grumbled about it a bit.   But today I'm feeling nearly back to normal. And yes, it feels so good to feel good again! I am definitely thankful!

I am ALSO thankful for colorful flowers still blooming in late October in my neighborhood. Kudos to those who did the planning and the planting months ago.

Coming soon: NaNoWriMo

So what in the world is NaNoWriMo?

You may have heard writers talk about it - maybe even just calling it NaNo.

NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, a thirty-day challenge to write 50,000 words during the month of November.  NaNoWriMo began in 1999 with 21 participants and has grown to over half a million on six continents.

As the name implies, it began with that first group of people encouraging each other to write a novel in November, but some of the current half-million people write non-fiction and are affectionately referred to as NaNo rebels.

I stumbled upon NaNoWriMo in 2010 and have been participating every year since.  That first couple years I tried to write a novel - or at least tried to pretend that’s what it was - but have since discovered that I’m just a NaNo rebel.  I have now completed the challenge 13 times.  I have even published two of those projects.

I started out with one basic goal really - simply to make the word count of 2000 words every day - and I learned SO MUCH in the process.  Participating in NaNo has been instrumental in helping me build a consistent writing habit and has taught me many things about myself.

NaNoWriMo has evolved into a very cool movement with lots of fun stuff.  I’ve always loved the hype created with charts and graphs and writing buddies. More recently they have added merch and swag - from coffee mugs and posters to shirts and puzzles and even books.

It’s not too late to join the NaNo challenge. In fact, why don't you go to the NaNo site and sign up - so you can get in and see all the cool stuff.  

Or if it really feels too big for this year, maybe at least get your feet wet by trying out some alternatives.  But don’t give up too quickly; okay?

NaNo, NaNo! 

Seasons of life

“My writing goal for this month is

to spend less time writing.” 

Wait; did I really say that?

A common question in writing groups might be something like “how’s your writing going this week?” Or “what is your writing goal this month? Good questions.

 

Our answers were often predictable about trying to find more time for writing. That’s why I was surprised to hear myself say that my writing goal for this month is to not spend so much time writing.  

Maybe I shouldn’t have been surprised. 

After all, I had been spending more time writing.  

Maybe too much time.

I had kept my head down and pushed myself to get that writing project done.

For months writing had been pretty much my single focus.  My top priority.

I was depleted.  My project was intensely personal and had been mentally and emotionally exhausting.  It certainly made sense that I needed a break.

So I took a break.

A week or two.

A month, maybe three.

Eventually I became aware of another thought that also caught me off-guard.

It was as if I didn’t want to be a writer anymore.

Or at least that I wanted to be something else besides a writer.

I had worked hard to become a writer. 

• I decided to start thinking of myself as a writer. 
• I slowly built a consistent writing habit. 
• I chose to focus on writing as one of my highest priorities.
• I started a blog… and have posted regularly for well over a decade!
• I wrote and self-published a book… and then another.

I gave up other things to become a writer. By prioritizing my writing, I set aside other things that I now want to value.  I don’t regret my writing focus, but that’s not all I want to be in this next season.  I want to be more than a writer.  I am ready to move writing to a lower spot on the list because other things need to move to the top - for at least this season.  I no longer want writing to consume the biggest chunk of my time or energy - nor to be my main identity.

A writer friend called it balance - implying that balance is a good thing.

Another writer friend said that balance is a myth.

So which is it?

Maybe it’s about balance through the seasons.

About big pictures and small details.

Maybe there will be times for a single focus… 

AND times for balanced perspective.

And so I pause... to ponder... the seasons of life.

Month-end

Looking back, looking ahead.

Grieve the losses.

Sadness, failures, discouragement, defeat.

Celebrate the good stuff.

The opportunities, the options, the possibilities.

The victories.

Steps taken, even the tiny ones.

The beginnings and the endings.

The starting and maybe especially the finishing.

Completions.

Conclusions.

Letting go.

Closure.

The end of a chapter.

Turning a page.

Things done well.

Things barely done.

What works?  What doesn’t?

What worked this past month?

What needs to change for the coming one?

Why do I keep noticing the date?

August 31…

Why does it catch my attention and give me pause?

Maybe it reminds me of my feelings about September, which has always felt like a new year.  When you are teachers and have kids in school, that’s the way life goes.  Maybe it will always feel that way.

We seem to need interludes.

Week-ends.

Maybe month-ends even more

A pause to note. To notice. To reflect.

To notate the shift. 

An alternative to just marking time.

Good-bye, sweet summer.

Good-bye, August.

Happy month-end.

Hello, new month. New year.

New season.

New opportunities. New unknowns.

Fresh starts.

Fresh focus.

Fresh gratitude that life goes on.

Here’s to more beginnings and endings.

Here’s to another new chapter.

Happy month-end to us.