Thankful Thursday - a day off the road

We are taking a long weekend here in Lincoln, Nebraska. I have been calling them days off but today hardly feels like a day off because we have been working rather hard - laundry and cleaning and organizing - but it feels so good to be a bit organized again. AND to have clean clothes. Oh, how wonderful.

When we are on the road every day, things tend to get a little mixed up - and not even through any fault of our own. After all, we have to keep things tidy and picked up and put away or we wouldn't be able to move around or function in the tiny bit of floor space left when we put the slider in for travel. I guess the biggest point of disorganization on this leg of the journey has been the jumble of things in the cupboards. I'm not totally sure why they are worse this time than the other previous journeys, but I do know a couple reasons.

The obvious culprit has been the horribly rough roads in Alaska as well as through Canada along the Alaska Highway. Those miles are brutal. I am thankful to have lost only one dish to breakage - after hearing stories from other campers about opening a drawer and finding nothing but fragments of broken glass and even just powder. Yah, yah, I should have known better than bring ANY glass dishes. But, hey, evidently I did know better than some people because I brought only a very few pieces and I normally wrap them for travel.

But even beyond the breakage issue is that things simply slide around and tip over and then slide some more. I think perhaps our pantry was not as full this time which would certainly have allowed more room for things to roll and scoot around.

So the moral of the story is to cut back on the glass dishes and don't forget to cushion the ones we do have. And keep those shelves either full or empty. AND maybe to choose our route more carefully from now on. Like maybe not travel the Alcan again!


As I was saying, I'm feeling very thankful to have a day to slow down and take care of business. And then a couple more days to rest and hang out with dear friends. That feels really good after being on the road for 11 days straight.

I'm reminded once again that we need two kinds of days off - at least. We need days off from our normal routine to take care of business. And we need days off for rest and refreshment. I'm thankful we get some of each today and this weekend.

Five-minute Friday and the word is FINISH

Five-minute Friday.
That's when you set the timer for five minutes and just type. No editing. Just type.
Then you are supposed to link to the Five-Minute Friday web page, but my computer has not been cooperating lately. But at least I write...
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Today's word: finish

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I'm not a good finisher.
Actually I'm a terrible finisher.
I'm a good starter or even a dabbler, but I'm not a good finisher.
I get lots of grand ideas and I start some of them, but they seldom see completion.
I seem to run out of steam.

It happens in lots of areas of life, but particularly with writing. I have ideas, I start gathering notes, I may write a lot of words, I might even get it mostly done, but I seldom actually finish.
So too with big projects in the rest of life.

Why am I so likely not to finish? What things contribute to my not finishing? I suppose there could be lots of reasons. Sometimes it may simply be that the task is too complex. That I don't know how to finish - or that it may be too difficult and I don't have the determination or the follow through.
And what are the consequences of not finishing? Well, I have this huge collection of unfinished projects. All kinds of loose ends. And they tend to cause me to feel crappy about myself.

• A famous person once said that incompletions are great stressors.

Well, I really hope to finish something today. Something big. Yep, yep. Today I hope to finish the Alaska Highway. And what an accomplishment it will be - even though I am not the one to really get the credit. My hubby is the one who has driven all those miles. My major credit comes from not gasping too loudly about the latest scary curve as I clutch the door handle a little tighter and my knuckles get a little whiter...

Nope; my man gets the credit - for hanging tight to that steering wheel as he guides those seven tons of steel around the steep narrow curves, for such sensible engine braking, for his calm demeanor, and for his patience with my tension. And I get to just ride along.

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And you? How are you at finishing?

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By the way, we made it. We finished the Alaska Highway! Both ways!!!
Now let's see what else I can finish...

Campsites I have known

The campgrounds are different. One night we will be lined up with other campers in a grassy field. The next night we might have a lovely spacious wooded campsite with pine-needle-covered trails leading here and there. And then we may revert back to the truck stop style line-up on stony gravel without enough room to even open our slider.

These were in fact our first three nights of this leg of the journey.

But there is one really good thing about these different campsites: the fact that it we only have to step inside to be at home. What a blessing! Especially on nights like this when my body is so exhausted and restless and desperately needs to crawl into my own bed.

So here I go...

At home in the Yukon Territory...

Good night.

Heading north to head south

First night on the road: Mountain View RV Park, Palmer, AK - where Bob was able to explore a gold mine and where we very much enjoyed shopping in a real grocery store with somewhat reasonable prices.

Yesterday we began the journey south - and east. But today we must go north to go south - and still east. We will angle up toward the Alaska Highway today.

We were talking these week with our girls about how different it is in the mountains as compared with the gridwork of one-mile squares that we are used to in the agricultural valleys of Michigan.

So today we drive north so that we can go south.

Time to leave; I wonder what I'm forgetting

Today is the day we pull out from Denali. Unbelievable. These five weeks have flown by so fast.

I wonder...

I wonder what else I need to do this morning.

I wonder if I can really be ready by 10 a.m. so that I can have time to hang out at the Black Bear before we have to pull out.

I wonder if I am remembering everything we need to stow away before hitching up.

I wonder what I'm forgetting to do here in the canyon.

I wonder how many tears I will shed today.

I wonder how many days it will take us to get to the Alaska Highway by going the south route and how many days to drive the length of the Alcan this time.

I wonder if I have enough Xanax for the mountain roads.

I wonder if we'll be able to get internet in tonight's camping spot. I wonder how long it will be before we can get internet along the highway.

I wonder when we will be able to wear short sleeves for most of the day.

I wonder when we will pull away from all the rain.

I wonder when I will be able to pack away my winter coat.

I wonder if we'll ever come back to Alaska. If so, I wonder where we would stay.

I wonder how many years the kids will keep working here.

I wonder if I will keep in touch with any of the people I have met here.

Of all the cool stories I've heard and want to write about, I wonder how many I will actually get written and posted. I know my pattern of good intentions and eventual lack of follow-through.

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Yep, I wonder about lots of things this morning. This kind of wondering is pretty typical for me on a travel day - particularly the first day of travel after being camped for a few weeks. I guess that's the way I process my pre-travel anxiety.

Thankful Thursday in the middle of a fun week

I'm feeling very thankful to have so much time with a couple daughters this week. Such fun to hang out with them.

And today I am actually thankful for a "day off" from all the fun while the sisters and their dad are traveling deep into the national park for hiking. Actually the road goes only 93 miles road into the six-million-acre park and their bus route covers only 60-some miles of that road - so maybe I shouldn't say that they are deep in the park. Deciding not to go with them today was a no-brainer for me because I can't keep up with their long legs and I knew I probably wasn't up for some of the scary mountain roads. Besides I needed a day to catch up on lots of things - so I was more than happy to stay home.

And speaking of being at home...
I'm also thankful for the extended time here in Denali to get acquainted with Wendi's world. I can hardly believe that it is winding down in just a few more days. These five weeks have flown by so quickly! It some ways it seems like we've been here just a short time while in other ways it feels like a wonderfully long time. It turns out that I love it here and feel at home - as if I'd been here awhile.

Freedom and independence

A day to celebrate freedom and independence.

They are to be celebrated; right?

I wonder.

I seem to remember some sort of mixed messages about those two concepts. For some reason, throughout my history in the church those words seemed to evoke conflicting opinions.


Freedom
On the one hand we sang songs about glorious freedom and heard sermons and admonitions to live in the freedom that was offered through Jesus. On the other hand if someone claimed to be enjoying freedom, that claim was often met with skepticism and judgment and the implication that said person must actually be rebelling against something.


Independence
So then I wonder about independence - where there was also some sort of negative association - as if it were synonymous with rebellion - at least in terms of thinking and believing. If we were talking about financial independence, that was to be lauded. But spiritual independence? Not so much.

Or maybe call it intellectual independence. Sermons were preached and lessons were taught about how vital it is to learn to think for yourself as an antidote for bowing to peer pressure. That kind of independence was considered good, wise, commendable, noble, admirable. But when it came to questioning the things you had been taught, not so much. Nope, it was NOT commendable to question the rules that were handed down nor the elders who handed them.

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Is it possible that independence is noble at times, but rebellious at other times? Am I the only one who wonders about this? Did anyone else receive mixed messages? Confusing "lessons" about freedom and independence?

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I should learn to be independent, so that if my friends ever pressure me to do something dangerous or unwise, I can think for myself and be able to say "no" and to stand up to said peer pressure.

BUT if it was a church leader who was pressuring me to do something dangerous or destructive, then I must humbly submit to that pressure. To question traditional and legalistic rules and restrictions or to dare to stand up to someone in authority was deemed to be rebellious and dangerous.

So which is it? Is independence good or is it rebellious? Is freedom desirable or dangerous? When is it right to be free? When is it appropriate to be independent and when should we submit?

What about American independence? What about those founding fathers? Were they "right" in standing up to oppression and demanding to be free? What about other revolutions? Where is the line between independence and anarchy?

How about now? What does freedom mean in modern America? When conservatives complain that we are losing our freedoms, they certainly seem to mean something different than when a gay couple cries out for equality regarding their child's medical care. Can both sides be right? Can they even get along?

But those questions can't be answered in one blog post. And they may well be above my pay-grade. Whatever that means. I do not feel capable of solving the world's complex problems and I certainly am not smart enough to have the answers to how others should answer these questions.

But then I don't have to, do I? I am not responsible for the decisions of others. It's complex enough for me to figure out my own response and my own responsibility.

So what about it? What about me? How will I define freedom and independence? More importantly how will I choose when to be independent and when/where to fight for freedom?

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A few conclusions at this moment in my journey of freedom:

• I am thankful for freedom and I celebrate it.
• I soberly accept the responsibility that comes with freedom and independence.
• I am wary of anyone who sets himself up as my authority and demands my submission.
• I realize that I am ultimately responsible to choose the authority figures and structures to whom I will submit; therefore, I seek to choose them wisely.
• I hope for wisdom to recognize injustice and oppression in my world and I pray for the courage to stand against them.
• I try to be alert to ways that I can provide and/or protect spaces of freedom for others.

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I still wonder about many questions, but I can proceed with the things I know to do.

Five-Minute Friday: Exhale

I love Five Minute Friday and have participated once in awhile. I keep telling myself that I want to do it more often. It is simply an opportunity to free write for five minutes with no editing or revising. Hundreds of people do this and link up on Lisa-Jo Baker's site.

Writing friends, this makes for a good exercise.

Today's prompt: EXHALE

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Exhale.

Remember to breathe.

That's something I tell people sometimes. People who seem so busy that I might be concerned about their well-being.

I sometimes feel like I don't need that reminder - because my life is relatively free from stress. However, once in awhile, I do need the reminder - simply to force myself to breathe more deeply. To calm down and relax.

My stress does not often come in the form of busyness these days - partly because of the season of life I'm in, but also because I have worked hard to back off from busyness as much as possible. That has been a long slow process. It involves not only slowing down my schedule, but also involves a deliberate acceptance on my part that the idea of a simpler life is indeed okay. For so very long, I connected busyness with my sense of worth. If I'm busy, I must be important; right?  What a crock! I'm a little embarrassed now to remember how important that was to me. Then again it is a very prevalent belief in our society.

I guess I'm still learning. And I will continue to remind myself. Inhale and breathe in simplicity and beauty. Exhale and breathe out those remnants of that false worldview that equates activity with value.

Inhale and enjoy.
Exhale and let go.

Raindrops and other morning sounds

Lazy morning.

It's raining again.

Snuggle a little deeper under the covers and listen to the rain on the roof.

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Sounds

Besides the raindrops...

Raindrops and other morning sounds

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The world outside is slowly waking up - as evidenced by sounds.

Lots of sounds.

As I listen, I realize that I recognize many of them...

The low rumble of the train in the mostly still quiet morning air and then the long whistle as it approaches the crossing and then comes into the station.

The big trucks hauling super long loads rolling through the canyon... when the stoplight is green. The deep growl of their engine braking when the light is red.

An airplane overhead. I guess the "Fly Denali" aerial tours have begun for the day.

Closer to our walls, I hear the first traffic within the park. Huge fancy rigs roaring to life to get an early start on the day's journey.

The garbage truck stops all along their route through this back alley followed by huge delivery trucks bringing supplies to the various restaurants and stores.

Suddenly the very loud Chinese-language conversations just under our window. Startling. Once that subsides, I hear another deep voice at the other end of our home. Must be one of the Bulgarian students who works at the ice cream store on his cell phone.

Now there's the big white van flying by - rattling on the bumps - presumably off to shuttle another load of tourists to the attraction they've chosen for the day.

And in between the rattling and roaring and rumbling, the steady sounds of raindrops.

Lazy morning.

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