Beware Time Change Thursday

’Tis the Thursday after time change…

Remember how our friend Nick, the elementary school principal, told us about the infamous Thursday after time change? About how it was the busiest day of the year with kids being sent to the principal’s office?

Make that the busiest TWO DAYS of the year - once in the spring and once in the fall. He said it didn’t seem to matter whether we were springing forward or falling back. Both ways it was disruptive.  And well documented.

As I think about that disruptive biannual tradition once again, my heart goes out to the teachers and principals around the world… AND the students…. AND their moms and dads.  

So what is there to be thankful for?

Well, this might be a really good time to pause and put the idea of disruption into context. So… instead of grumping once again about this awful tradition, maybe I can think about a few other people around the world whose lives have been disrupted this week.  Like really disrupted!  With bombs and killing all around them. Like the Americans living and working around the world who suddenly find themselves trying to find flights to escape from danger.

Sure enough, I did it, didn’t I? I suddenly pulled the story back to being about Americans, didn’t I? How easy it is for us to see the world through our own rose-colored lenses.

So now what do I do with these thoughts and this disruption on this Thursday designated for thankfulness? I can hear myself thinking that I’m thankful that my major disruptions are pretty small compared to the rest of the world.  But even that can get a little cheesy and weird.

One of the purposes for this tradition was to remind myself that I have MUCH to be thankful for.  

And yes, I ended that sentence with a preposition.  

And yes, I want my heart to be tender toward those across my city and around the world.

Even though I don’t know how my tender heart can solve such dilemmas I want it to be tender.  

Kind. 

Compassionate. 

I wish to show empathy.

I wish to care - even when it hurts.

If all else fails, take a walk!

 

I was crabby

Grumpy

Nagging my dear man

Crying

Asking his forgiveness - which he kindly gives.

Sadness

Fear 

Meanness 

So many people hurting

Scared

Downright terrified

So much bad news

Gotta’ look for the good things

Thank goodness, there are also many of them

Good times with wonderful people

Wisdom

Insight

Perspective

Learning from each other

I want to be kind and forgiving

Patient and understanding

I want to forgive others

I want to forgive myself

I want to shed my grumpiness

Maybe go for a walk

So I did.

It worked!

Holiday thoughts

 On this Memorial Day, I pause to think of some things that I really don’t understand.  Things like war and peace and structures of government and patriotism.  Things like those who serve our country with honor and valor and integrity.  

But I also think about those who "serve" with little to no integrity or honor. Those who use power to support their own greed. Those who deal in corruption and oppression. I think (several times a day!) about the horrific mess the world is in.  I am embarrassed by my own country’s part in so many of the messes. 

I often feel hopeless about those whose lives are being torn apart and who can find no safety - and those whose meager food supply is stopped by big cranky egotistical politicians. Sometimes I just want to shake people or scold them into behaving better - as if THAT would work!!!

I wish I knew what to do to make things better.  The only thing I’ve come up with is to respond in an opposite spirit.  When I see corrupt powerful people shame and harm helpless people, I try to remind myself to watch for opportunities to build people up.  To elevate them. To contribute to their safety and/or wellbeing.  

I also watch for other people who are successfully helping the oppressed and making the world a better place.  They give me hope.   And they inspire me to keep trying.

For my own sanity and mental health, I’m learning to limit my exposure to such awful words and deeds from the bullies out there.  Instead I choose to pay attention to and promote the work of those who are protecting and caring for the ones who are being bullied.  I really like people who stand up for people who are bullied. Those who show compassion rather than contempt.

And I discover that there are a WHOLE LOT of them out there.

Hallelujah!

Hands: a reminder from Jewel

If I could tell the world just one thing

It would be that we're all okay

Not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful

And useless in times like these

Our hands are small nice weapons

Of conscience if they're not idle with despair

We gather ourselves around our faithful light

As the darkness most feared

Our hands are small, I know

But they're not yours, they are our own

But they're not yours, they are my own

And we shall go unbroken

Some things are subject

to a higher law

You do not own us you who never saw

You won't use my hands to fight your wars

To close your eyes, to cripple your doors

'Cause getting by isn't getting enough

And neither is welfare or thankless jobs

Because where there is a man

who has no voice

There our shackles sing

Our hands are small, I know

But they're not yours, they are my own

But they're not yours, they are our own

And we shall go unbroken

In the end, only kindness matters

In the end, only kindness matters

Some things cannot be broken

Some things can't be undone

You cannot ever take away

What has already been won

Our hands are small, I know

But they're not yours, they are my own

But they're not yours, they are our own

And we shall go unbroken

We shall go unbroken

...

Thank you, Jewel. 

Twenty years

I got the phone call with the dreaded news twenty years ago today.

Yes, it is cancer.  

Two days before Christmas.

Such a diagnosis claims instant power to freeze the frames of your life.

Fear barges into the picture.

Questions cry out.

Priorities shift.

Christmas plans fade into the shadows along with other duties and responsibilities… until slowly… we are somehow able to step out from behind the bad news and go through the motions of the celebration that continues around us.  Life goes on - or so we hope.

I have no idea why I was one of the lucky ones with good outcomes in my treatment plan. No clue why I’m a survivor even while losing dear friends and family members to cancer.

Yes, I am grateful for my good fortune. 

And yes, I am aware of some sense of pressure to live well. 

I often think of those dear ones and wish they could still have that privilege.  What a blessing to have had them in my life and to have learned valuable lessons from every one of them.

Becky 

Jerry

Karin

Jodi

Karina

Ron

I think of others who have also lost dear ones to this awful disease.  

And other diseases.

And reckless drivers.

And acts of war.

Sometimes I don’t know what to do with such sadness.

All I know to do is to care.

To offer kindness and compassion.

Thankful for kindness and respect

Today I am thankful for friends who are reasonable and real and honest, but also kind and respectful.  They almost feel like a rare breed in these days of division and vitriol and it can feel tricky to find safe places to think and talk and process.

I don’t fit on “this” side nor do I want to stand on “that” side.

They both feel dangerous and scary.

I tend to withdraw and avoid.

But I need to process the hard stuff.

I need perspective for my blind spots.

I need correction where I’m just plain wrong.

I’m so glad that there ARE people out there who are safe.

There are people who are reasonable.  

Who are kind and compassionate and patient.

Who remind me to do the best I can. 

And to keep learning… 

So that I can do better.

I am grateful to know such people.

March to March

A year ago we barely knew what a pandemic was.

We’d heard about them in different parts of the world.

Couldn’t happen here.

But it did.

People got sick

People we know

And people we don’t know

Fear, confusion, frustration

Too many voices contradicting each other

Is there an end in sight?

Maybe a vaccine

In record time, but it seemed so slow.

The curve flattened…

Then another surge 

And another

Finally

A year later

After waiting in line 

A few of us get the call

A few more

Shots in arms

Photos on Facebook

Celebration

Robust reactions

Compared notes

Sighs of relief

More people get sick

Somebody else dies

Somebody we know 

As we get our vaccine

It’s not over

We can’t quit

Just like real life

We must keep on

Cautious and careful

Precaution and kindness

Take care of ourselves and each other

Common sense

Common courtesy

Compassion