A day in the life...

Have I ever mentioned that I love Facebook memories?!?

Yep, I do.

And it's not just the exotic beach vistas.

Sometimes it's the exotic laundry facilities.

Other times it's the gratitude at finding internet access!

And some times it is being reminded of some particularly wise words of wisdom...

On this date, January 23, through the years we were...

2013  -  living at the Cove, El Frances, Samana, D.R.

 Wow! Internet again! Two days in a row. Wait; three times in two days! That won't be the pattern, I'm sure. But my neighbor with a car needed to get online for an hour so she invited me to come again. Yippee!!!

 Looks like I won't have time to post much this time - mostly just catch up on what's happening back home.

…

 After getting dropped off in town yesterday, we found a nice little French restaurant, a place to rent a four-wheeler - which we will probably do sooner than later, a little shop where I shall return to buy a huge cool tote bag, the supermercado, and then we successfully caught a gua-gua back to the cove. A very successful day.

2014  -  living at Kenney Grove County Park in Fillmore, CA

Mostly from the fruit stands out on the highway. I'm so excited about them.

2015  -  living in a campground on Dauphin Island, Alabama

Overheard at the monthly potluck at the campground: 

Those old people like to dance!!!

Celebrating the 60th anniversary of the Tater Tot. It's what's for dinner.

And...

We finally stopped at the bakery here on the island. Oh, my. Bacon bread and cinnamon rolls are good enough to eat. Oh, yah. Cheese Danish awaits evaluation.

2016 - living in Las Galeras, Samana, D.R.

(Walked 2.15 miles along the beach and to town)

'Twas a good walk. Until the dogs! Puppies first. Very aggressive puppies. Stuck with me all the way along the beach! And then bigger dogs. Not fun to deal with. But then things got better when I got to the boulangerie. A great selection, my reward for getting there so early. Mmmmmm.... How about one with chocolate for mi esposo and maybe some flan for me? Si. S'il vous plaît. Exquisite.

…

Well, I think that's the first time I've ever had to de-snag my drying laundry from the cactus plants growing nearby.

2019 - living in a house in Flint, Michigan

 Philip Yancey of his grandmother: She left me the gift of grace, which I can never repay. Because it was grace, she never made me feel I had to.

The Ta-Da! Month

I already wrote about the fact that I let myself get too busy in May.

I made commitments I shouldn't have.

Or at least probably wouldn’t have...

... if I had known the unexpected things that would pop up.  

But we never know, do we?

That's why we need to plan margins in our schedule.

That's what I failed to do for May.

Forget the margins.

Margin-less May

So...

What about June?

Will I do better?

What will I do differently?

I decided to try something quite different in June.  I remembered my experiences with a Ta-Da! list and thought it could be fun to make a month-long one.  

It felt like the perfect kind of “opposite” from what May had been like.

My to-do lists had been impossibly long.

It was definitely time for something different.

Sure I still had to make some lists of obligations and things that I dare not forget, but I decided to shift my focus whenever possible. I would watch for chances to do things that I could be excited about.  Things about which I could say Ta-Da! at least to myself. Wouldn’t it be cool to have a whole month’s worth of Ta-Da! items?

Each evening I would add to the list.  It could be only one thing each day - but lots of days had more than one item.

What kinds of things?

All kinds of fun things - and even a few not so fun

Like that phone call I’ve been needing to make - check!  Ta-Da!

The appointment I’ve been putting off - Got that scheduled! Ta-Da!

The left-over project from May that was ALMOST done but not quite…  Got ‘er done! Ta-Da!

I sorted through photo files that have been languishing.  Ta-Da!!!

I rode my bike - NINE miles one day - and lots of shorter rides.  Ta-Da!

I sat out in the sun for my 15-minute dose of Vitamin D.  Yay!

I thought about an old friend. I should get in touch with her sometime.  But wait!  Let’s do it now.  So I did.  Ta-da!

Did my usual morning routines in record time.  Ta-Da!

Had a lovely visit with a new neighbor.  Ta-Da!

Walked downtown with hubby on his business errand.  Yay!

Did some porch-sitting.  Cha-ching!

Worked ahead (in advance!) to prepare my report for the upcoming board meeting.  Smart move!

Finished the HUGE project I’ve been working on for months.  Ta-Da!

So far I’m liking this experiment.

I’m thinking ahead to other Ta-Da! lists.

Sometimes they nudge me to stretch myself at bit toward becoming all that I can be.

Sometimes I even surprise myself.

Ta-Da!

How much is enough?

Is it just me? 

Or does anybody else ever feel like you're not doing enough?

Not doing THIS enough and not doing THAT enough...?

Other people have expectations of us.

Social media sets up unrealistic standards.

It can be easy to feel like I should be doing more.

I should do this or that more often.

More frequently.

More regularly. 

More consistently.

Or I should care more.

I should be more available.

I should be better at this...

(And yes, that's a whole lot of should's but that's a subject for another time.)

What a set-up for discouragement!

What a load of guilt can get dumped on us!

...

But you know what?

We simply cannot do it all!

Certainly not all of the things that everybody wants us to do - and not even everything that we might think we ought to do.

...

One of the best things I've ever done is to stop and ask:

How much is enough?

How much should I be doing really?

What is realistic?

What is healthy?

Reasonable?

What lines up with who I am?

With the kind of person I want to be, but also with my priorities and responsibilities...

...

It's tough to be objective about whether we are doing enough - especially when other people's expectations are far different from ours.  Sometimes we have to compromise and sometimes we must experiment to see what will actually work.

One of my ongoing examples is writing.

I can easily feel like I'm not writing enough.

Oh, dear; am I writing enough?

Perhaps the more important question is:

How much is enough?

How often is appropriate?

How MUCH should I do each time?

(How many words, how many projects, how many hours...?)

How in the world

will I know if I'm doing enough

if I don't have a clue

how much I should be doing?!?

I’m happy to report that this process is helping - with my writing, with relationships, with chores, with outside commitments...

Now when I begin to feel like I'm not doing enough I can pause and think about my answers to that key question.  I can much more objectively see that "Yes, I am doing enough at this moment" or maybe admit "Oops; it is true that I need to do that one more time this week."

It was no fun to be stuck in subjectivity and always feeling like I wasn't doing enough. 

Or wasn't doing something OFTEN enough.

Or LONG enough.

Or whatever...

It feels so much more reasonable and healthy to be able to take a look at my goals and at the reality and to see whether adjustments need to be made to my schedule.  I suppose it is a type of self-accountability.

This is a tool to become a better person.

A dependable worker

A faithful friend

More consistent

More reasonable

More balanced

And definitely a healthier person

More satisfied and contented

It feels good to be consistently doing the things that are important.

I like myself a whole lot better... 

On this day...

I really do love Facebook memories. 
That "on this day" feature that pops up every day.  
It reminds me of adventures we've had and places we've been, but it also reminds me of my wonderings and some of my silliness in a typical day.  It is so fun to see the variety that pops up on a specific date through the years.  
Oh, the wonderings and the wanderings!

2010

… is excited about a week-end with her girls!!!

 we're going to a beach house at St. Joe. Too bad it's gonna' be rainy, but we'll have fun anyway!!!

...This was to celebrate my 60th and it was very wonderful to hang out with my favorite women...

2011

 Lina's here! Yay!!! And her parents, too!

2012

Courage is not the absence of fear,

but rather the judgement

that something else

is more important than fear.

The brave may not live forever,

but the cautious do not live at all.

-Genovian prince

...I like to pay attention to famous thinkers even when they are not real…

2012

"Fry bacon, add onions”

Now there's a free Kindle title that just might be worth “buying."

Yep, it's a cookbook…

2013

Earth Day. 

What can I do to take better care of this amazing planet? Sometimes I get overwhelmed by all the things that I SHOULD do, but I can pick one new habit at a time.

2013

Note to self: Read things carefully before reacting.

"Fried in deep pan" is quite different than "Friend in deep pain”

Yes, read carefully...

2013

I've been wondering what surprises I might discover at our new place this spring. I was thinking of flowers and didn't expect a pair of ducks on our lawn lake - probably because I didn't know we might have a lake. That's fun.

...This was when we lived in the old log house at the tree farm...

2014

I picked oranges today - first time ever!

...Longer version:

I found a new friend! A Spanish-speaking one. All of the other neighbors I had chatted with so far have been English-speaking. But finally I found one that will help me learn Spanish. Yay!!!

… And she invited me to come and visit.

… At least I think that's what she said!

AND she gave me some oranges and avocados. She let me help pick the oranges - my first time to do that! How fun.

...While living and working in a little county park in Southern California...

2015

“You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you.  What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of a difference you want to make.”

 - Jane Goodall

2015

Today's walk around the lake has been interrupted by frozen nose and has officially been scuttled. Replaced with clam chowder. Yep.

...Our campground in Ortonville, Michigan, included a small lake.  Walking the mile-mile trail around the lake was a regular daily activity for us...

2017

Walking to the Farmers' Market to do the SuperHero Fun Run...

I am a superhero today.

The Superhero Races raise funds to help kids at risk of violence. Every child needs a hero.

...We had just moved to Flint and I did the SuperHero Fun Run with some of the grandkids.  Just call me SuperGram.  The little guys walked home with us afterward.

It is SO fun to live right here in the city where we can walk to and from all kinds of places.

And then the other kids and other grandkid arrived for their first visit to our new place.  What a wonderful fun time together...

Taking the little guys for a walk. 

Found the orange playground where the cousins introduced Riley to slides! 
Much shrieking and laughter! 

Back home another way. I told the kids there are a thousand ways to our house. My grand-daughter told me that she can't believe we got a house with a table big enough for us all to sit.

What a fun family visit!

Halfway there!

I just crossed the halfway point in my NaNoWriMo* project. This is my eighth year to participate in NaNo and the writing has been flowing pretty well. I have been sticking to my word count goal of 2000 words/day in order to make it to the 50,000 word goal for the month of November.

It is always interesting to see what direction the writing will go.  

A couple times I had a pretty defined plan or outline for the writing.

Many years I have gone into the month without much direction.

This year I had a plan - or at least I thought I did.  I wrote along that plan for the first few days and then got stuck.  As I attempted to keep cranking out the words, it seemed that I had changed directions.  I have since had to admit that I might have two very different books here.  And that’s okay. I’ll just keep typing and try to label things enough that I can separate them upon completion.

…

The original plan was to write about my new city - to share first impressions of Flint and our first few months living here.  I’m still excited about that project and moving forward with it. Working on that theme has pushed me to do research and to keep checking out more of what is around here.  I keep reading, I keep talking to people and mostly I keep listening - all of which help me to keep learning about this fascinating city.  

For example, in just the last few weeks we have checked out Applewood and Sloan Museum and taken in the first of hopefully many concerts at Flint Institute of Music.  

Flint ArtWalk takes places on the second Friday of every month and we’ve just participated for our second time - sort of.  More about that later...

The Holiday Walk over in the College Cultural Area sounds pretty cool so we will go with our students.  

On my walk yesterday I stopped at the U of M library - which has been on my list for awhile - but I had been nudged a bit by a picture one of our students posted recently.  Sure enough I found the spot where he shot it - overlooking the river and several prominent buildings that have become important to us and our life here.

Not surprisingly the library has dozens of little reading and writing nooks.  I LOVE finding spots like that and look forward to hanging out there from time to time.  They even had a sign near the door about NaNoWriMo and I learned that the guy at the information desk is a fellow Wrimo - so that was fun.

Possibly the biggest task in learning our surroundings is the food scene.  I was told that I would always be an outsider until trying a Flint Coney dog - so I have taken steps to rectify that while checking off one more restaurant from the list of places we want to try.  That list is really long and we are not making very fast progress because once we find a place we like, we want to go back there again and again.  But we will force ourselves to keep working through that list.  What a happy chore!

The list gets rearranged from time to time - as we listen and learn.  This week, I discovered that the son of one of our new friends is a chef downtown and we’ve heard rave reviews so I guess Churchill’s has just been bumped up a little higher on the list.

In fact we decided to tackle the list today - to see what we can learn about Chinese take-out.  Success - 1.5 miles from our house!  Yay! Sure enough, it’s a tough task.

…

Meanwhile National Novel Writers Month continues and I keep typing toward the goal of 50,000 words during the month of November.

I’m feeling good about being halfway there with a few days to spare.

And I’m enjoying the process - of writing AND of getting to know my city better.

...

*NaNoWriMo = National Novel Writing Month

Thousands of participants around the world commit to write at least 50,000 words during the month of November.  And then the editing process begins in December and beyond.

Forgot to blog

Oops; I just remembered that I have a blog.

I've been forgetting to write something on it.

I guess I got distracted.

Distractions

Yep, we live in a land of distraction.

Lots of fun distractions

• Like grandkids to visit and care for
• Like a new neighborhood to explore
• Like LOTS of restaurants to check out
• Like being able to watch Jeopardy! 
• Like remembering how to drive a stick shift again

Also some not so fun distractions. 

Like medical appointments.

Like an ugly political circus filling the news and social media.
(Now there's one that can distract me and steal my joy and my peace - IF I let it - so I've made a decision not to let it!)

I am a bit ambivalent about some of the distractions in my life these days. I am thrilled by the opportunities, but struggling to remember how to find balance in my schedule. 

I really want to establish healthy routines. I want to walk a couple miles each morning which I mostly enjoy but I don’t walk very fast which means that every mile takes a chunk out of my day.

I really do want to check out lots of the restaurants in our area. So fun. But so much food. I do NOT need all of the food in a typical serving so I usually take most of it home where it becomes another meal or two in the following days. That’s all good.

Social opportunities are abundant for us in this new season. It has been awhile since I’ve had so many options. Maybe I've forgotten how to balance the appointments with my normal work.

There are educational opportunities. 

I am currently taking a couple on-line courses - and barely keeping up with the assignments! 

And books! So many books! 

There are shelves and shelves of books at the library, but how to pick just one. There are boxes and boxes full of my favorite books that have been stored away for four years - that I am delighted to be able to access again - but where do I start?

And speaking of boxes and boxes… Yes, there are still bins and boxes from our storage unit that I simply must keep working my way through.

These opportunities all take time. 

• Checking out the new town takes time. 
• Getting to know my neighbors takes time. 
• Catching up with family and friends takes time. 
• Sorting through all those boxes takes time. 
• Walking a couple miles takes time - every day. 
• Making those phone calls to set up appointments takes time. 
• Driving to the appointments and sitting in waiting rooms takes time. 
• Doing homework assignments takes time.  

And blogging takes time - or it gets crowded out of the schedule. Or forgotten!

Limitations

Time management has always been a weak spot for me. Now that I am back in the land of opportunity, it’s time to pull out the wise tactics that I learned back in the day. IF I can remember what they are.

I know that I am not alone in this struggle. In fact, my schedule is shockingly clear compared to the average person’s. Probably most of us have a natural tendency to get too busy. There are so many demands on our time - by our own desires, by the people we love, by society in general.  

It is SO easy to let our calendars fill up with good stuff. We must find ways to assess our schedules so that we can intentionally find the balance that we need.

Over the last few years I had gradually become convinced that writing is one of the important things that I do - but it doesn’t look like it lately.
I am noticing that now.
I can choose what to do about it.
Now.

Seasons

Our lives unfold in seasons. 

• Seasons of child-raising and career-building. 
• Seasons of good times and hard times. 
• Seasons of abundance as well as lean seasons.
• Seasons where we can barely hold on and other seasons where there is some margin. 
• Some room to grow, space to create, time to explore.

During these last few years of travel, my seasons have been more pronounced than in previous years. Some of those seasons have been sparse in terms of options; consequently it is natural that I would want to take advantage of the vast opportunities in this season. Several of the travel seasons have been lonely so now it is great to have the chance for regular contact with loved ones. In this season of abundant opportunity it is tempting to try for more than we have time or energy for.

Choices

And you?

• What season are you in? 
• Is it an extremely busy season or is there some margin? 
• Are you happy about your priorities and how they play out in your schedule?
• Which things would you change in your schedule if you could?
• Is it possible to make any of those changes - or to even start moving in that direction?
• Is there something that you’ve been neglecting that you really wish you could be doing now - or very soon? 
• What is it worth to you?
• Can you sacrifice something else for it?

We do have choices, you know. Usually more than we realize.

My work? What do I do?

I’ve always had a complicated relationship with work. With my job. Only a few of my jobs have been well-defined or easy to explain. They were the ones with specific set hours, an easily understood title and/or job description. The ones with an actual paycheck every two weeks.

The rest of my jobs have been more vague. Less specific.  

“You do what?” 

“Do you get paid for that?”

"What exactly is it that you do?” 

Most moms in America have had some encounter with the “working mom vs. stay-at-home mom” debate. There has been more than enough confusion and criticism swirling around that topic. I’ve been in the middle of it - both as the subject of conversation and as internal battle within myself. I noticed that once I added foster mom to my list of responsibilities, I felt like I had a little more cred - because maybe that seemed more like work than just being a “regular” mom, but it still was easy to argue with myself as to whether being a mom was a real job or not. 

And then there was the whole world of volunteer ministry. Lots of people do volunteer work and lots of people do ministry without pay. And that’s what I did for many years. Once again I dealt with the internal conflict whether it was a real job or not.

When it came to organizing my own time schedule and evaluating my personal dreams and goals, I could confidently claim this “ministry” as my work. But when others asked what I “do” I struggled to articulate it.

In recent years, I’ve turned another corner and have found the courage to call myself a writer. To declare that writing is my work. It is what I “do” now. Once again, there is no clock to punch, no specific hours to be on-duty, no job description and no paycheck, but hey, I’m used to that.

...

Enter retirement. Retired people don’t work anymore. They don’t have a job. They just sit around with time on their hands. Right? They have to find hobbies to fill their time and evidently some of them still get bored. 

Nope. Not true for me. I can’t imagine feeling bored. I haven't had to get used to a new schedule because things haven’t changed much for me. Here I was just getting used to this thing of being a writer and carving out a writing schedule. I still don’t seem to be able to find enough hours in the day to keep up with my writing projects. And now that hubby is actually retired, I find myself wanting to join him in at least some of his adventures! But then I have even less time to write. I pretty much always feel behind with my work schedule, but then that is nothing new. I have always been a starter and a dabbler and not such a great finisher. 

But it works. It works pretty well, in fact. I’m grateful to have meaningful work that I love. To be passionate about one's job is a privilege. I’m also grateful to have a lifestyle that allows me to continue my work. The necessities for my job are fairly minimal. A small space, a table and chair, my computer, electrical power and internet access - and I’m all set. Or I can be portable - taking my computer along to restaurants for free WiFi. I can also write with just pen and paper. Duh. What a novel idea!

The only thing left to figure out is my work schedule. What hours do I work? Yes, it's true that some of those times when I’m sitting at my computer, I’m NOT writing. Imagine that! Sometimes I’m chatting with a friend. Sometimes I’m wasting time surfing the web. And sometimes I’m even playing Solitaire. *gasp* 

My work schedule is fluid. Not rigid in any way. Some weeks the daily schedule is predictable, but many weeks it is not. And that’s okay. I’m adjusting to that idea. 

In fact, I am downright loving it.

It’s not just okay; 

it is wonderful.