Two lives, two stories

Life A was my life as an insider.
A life of always striving...
To do right and to be right.
Of needing to impress.
A life of rules.
A life of effort.
A life of diligence and discipline.
A life of restriction.

...

Life B is my life outside the walls.
A life where it's okay to ask questions.
Where it is safe to express doubt.
Or wonderings.
A life where I don't have to always be right - nor have all the answers.
A life where people make mistakes and aren't afraid to admit them - even the leaders.
A life of grace.
A life of adventure.
A life of trust.
A life of freedom.

...

I never want to go back to Life A.
Unfortunately I catch myself once in awhile...
Still clinging to that life.
Still fearing condemnation.
Still following the rules.
Still needing to be right.
Still wanting to impress.
Still pretending to have all the answers.


Fortunately that happens only rarely.
Most of the time I am thrilled to be breathing the air of freedom.
Most of the time I can't imagine going back inside.