how does that help?

"You guys!  How does that help?!?"

That’s what I want to yell when someone posts something negative or judgy or blame-y or complain-y or whatever…  

Fear is a crazy thing and fearful people do crazy things.  But condemning them or calling them names probably doesn't help.  Which I why I want to yell my question.  However, I usually restrain myself.

I do think that it is actually a fair question.  So maybe I should be asking it of myself... like whenever I open my mouth to offer my expert opinion of what should have been done differently.  Yah, how does that help?  How do my words help anybody or anything?

A wise young friend astutely observed…   Regardless of how we got here, the situation is what it is and I’m just really hoping everyone stays safe and healthy!

And he's right.  This is where we are and what we have to work with.  We don't have the option to go back and change how we got here.  We have only the choice of what to do with it.

We have to start where we are and this is where we are now. We can start asking how to make the best of it.  

• I can learn new skills; in fact, I might need to learn new skills - like how to participate in online meetings.
• I might even need to brush up on some old skills.
• I can use the time to catch up on work around the house.
• I might tackle a project I've been wanting to do. 
• I could maybe even finish that old uncompleted one. 
• Maybe I can bake those monster cookies.
• I could learn how to play "Words with Friends."
• I can read more of those books I hauled home from the library.
• I could call that friend who has been on my mind.  I could even write her a letter!
• I might look for creative ways to help other people.  What could I do to make the world a better place?

I may feel powerless about what is happening out there, but maybe I can pick one little spot in my own little space and turn chaos into calm.

I hope to do several of those items on my list above

I will probably need to consult the list now and then - because I tend to forget my good intentions and my great ideas.

...

But I also hope to add a new habit...  

I really want to pay attention to myself and to notice when I'm about to spout off my opinion about what somebody should do. I want to learn to pause in those moments and ask myself "How does that help?"