Thankful Thursday: mixed feelings

It feels like too long.
Most of the time it's okay, but today it feels too long.

When we agreed to take this five-month commitment which would become part of a seven-month journey, I was afraid it would be too long. Too long to be away - particularly from the grandkids. They change so fast and I miss them so much. Last night before going to sleep, I grabbed my phone to listen to some of the precious sweet voice memos that I had recorded of my little grand-daughter. We listened and chuckled despite the lump in my throat.

Back in December, when we were deciding about that commitment and making those plans, we thought we would break up the seven months with a trip home to Michigan in April or May - so I thought I could make it. But then we made an unexpected trip home in February so there probably won't be one in May.

Besides missing family, I also just plain miss the month of May in Michigan. It has always been my very favorite time of year. I love the colors of spring - the yellow-green light that came in through the north window from under the canopy of trees as they were budding out for another season of growth, the frothy-pink blossom of the redbud trees and the bright yellow daffodils.

So now it is May and I think I have accepted the fact that I probably won't get back there - the first time in my life to not be in Michigan in May. And now I have a choice about what to do with that fact. I could moan and groan - and I probably will - more than once. In fact, I guess maybe that's what I'm doing at this very moment. But I can also find lots of things to celebrate. After all, I have been able to get the jump on spring this year. I've already been enjoying warm temps. I already have a good suntan. I already have to wash smelly sweaty clothes. I already have to turn on the AC more often than I would like. I get to live in sunny California for yet another month even while preparing to pack up and hit the road for the next adventure. I have no cause to complain.

And I get to be with my youngest daughter for my special days this year - something very much worth celebrating.

I also celebrate modern technology. I love cell phones and Facebook and e-mail and Facetime! Lots of us grandmas originally joined Facebook primarily to be able to keep up with photos of our kids and grand-kids whether near or far away. I especially love FaceTime and being able to tell the little guys good-night and be silly and blow kisses with them. What a wonderful world we live in where we can do such things!

And I have lots of exciting things on my May calendar and on my to-do list - way more things than I will ever be able to get done. Some things will be hard and some will be fun. And some will be both. There will be tears and sadness and there will be celebration. Life is worth celebrating.

So on this first day of May, this first May away from my home state, I choose to have a good month. On this Thursday, there is much for which to be thankful - so that is what I choose.