The ABCs of reaching a goal

I did it!

I completed a goal. A pretty big one even. I not only finished it, but I surpassed it.

Yep, that is big news because I don't often succeed in reaching my goals. In fact, it is a woefully rare event.

The challenge was to walk 100 miles in a month. I knew that was not reasonable for me - so I set my personal goal at 40 miles for September - something much more doable. Amazingly I hit that goal on Day 18 - way ahead of time - so I decided to keep going. Then I remembered that I had walked almost 40 miles in August so hey, why don't I combine the two months?

It had actually been suggested that we could take two months - or longer - to do the 100 miles so why not? I started pushing toward this secondary goal buoyed up by my early success. I am thrilled to report that I made it - and even a day early.

That's right; I walked 100 miles during August and September.

A goal set and a goal met!
Two goals set and two goals met!!!

Like I started to say, my relationship with goals and goal setting has been a little rocky.

I really like the idea of setting goals. It seems like such a smart thing to do. A strategic thing. Goals feel somehow noble. Lofty. Transcendent. I have been known to get excited or at least hopeful about goals.

Unfortunately, I've also been known to get discouraged and defeated about goals. About falling behind and failing to reach them. Therefore, because my track record for completing goals is not great, I never quite know whether to make them or not. I don't want to live aimlessly and not know where I am headed, but neither do I want to set myself up for failure.

Not willing to completely give up on the idea of setting goals, I have tried to observe some of the things that seem to work for me. Things that tend to be associated with success. My success. I'm smart enough to realize that it might be strategic to make use of those things that work for me. Here are a few that I've noticed with this 100-mile goal - as well as with some epic writing goals when I participated in NaNoWriMo each of the last four years.

Accountability
This is another tricky concept - one that can easily be misused or even abused. All too often I've heard people make lots of noise about accountability in cases where I have not seen any positive results. I know to stay away from several "types" of accountability. But at least one kind of accountability works for me. I suppose it might also be called "approval addiction" in my case. For certain rewards - like words of admiration and affirmation, like hugs and pats on the back, like empathy and encouragement, I can push myself to do hard stuff.

So the trick for me is to figure out how to get people to line up and cheer for me as I struggle to the finish line.

Okay; so maybe I'm being a bit facetious, but how do I entice people to support me? Sometimes it is as simple as offering the same encouragement to them. Sometimes it is in the comraderie. Sometimes an online group will serve that purpose for me. Sometimes I have to be creative to figure out how to find the encouragement that I need.

Does that seem a little egotistical? A bit self-centered? Of course it is. Or at least it would be if I weren't willing to reciprocate and offer something in return. Yah, yah, I know; this probably sounds like a really soft form of accountability. Rather squishy and ineffective. Perhaps you believe that accountability must be firm and tough - and maybe it does for some people. But that brand can also feel very unsafe and harsh - and for me that is downright de-motivating.

Yep, in the case of my surprising success, much of the credit goes to the fact that I had an audience. That could seem like the wrong motivation, but hey, it worked!

Baby steps
I don't know about you, but when I get excited about setting new goals I often want to jump right in and get 'er done. Right now. Why not just do a bunch of those miles today and the rest of them tomorrow? Yah, I might get impatient. And unrealistic. If this goal is lofty and good, then I tend to think in terms of grand steps to get there. The only problem is that I often am not capable of accomplishing huge grand steps.

What I can usually accomplish are small steps. Baby steps. One friend (i.e.: accountability buddy) often reminds me to set aside just 15 minutes each day - even though I might think that doesn't seem like enough. Another keeps encouraging me to take those baby steps. And then there are times when I have to remind myself of my own conclusions about picking just one thing to work on. Just. One. Thing. And then another.

Some days I feel like I just can't do it. Maybe I will talk myself into getting out there and walking just half a mile. Shoot; some days I can only convince myself to put on my shoes and go out the door and walk around the cabin and come back in. But usually, when I do that... Well, you know... usually I end up walking a little farther than I thought I could.

Cumulative effect
Have you ever noticed how things tend to pile up? Yep? No? Well, maybe not for you, but for me stuff accumulates in piles until the piles tip over and make new piles. Accumulation is a powerful thing.  And it is a force that can be either positive or negative.

I experienced the negative effects of poison accumulating in my system during chemotherapy. After the first round, I was kinda' sick and a little tired. After the second and third rounds, I was feeling sicker and more worn out. By the last round, well, let's just say that I did not feel very well at all nor did I have much energy. Sure enough I was suffering from the cumulative effect of the chemo in my body.

A similar thing happens in our homes or maybe on our desks. When we stay current and keep the desktop clear, it is easy to straighten up and be ready for the next project. But once we let things start to pile up, they seem to grow out of control at warp speed. There we see the negative side of accumulation.

However we can learn to take advantage of the positive power of accumulation and harness it for our own purposes. I can do today's portion today - and maybe even a little bit more. Then tomorrow I do it again and the miles add up.

This is why month-long goals work well for me. If I declare that I will do certain things every day, I set myself up for failure. But if I am working toward a cumulative goal, I get my kicks out of doing a little extra each day and getting ahead of schedule. Then if I miss a day, I don't fall behind. When I work on a cumulative goal, the momentum builds. I get excited and it helps me keep going.

Oh, and you better believe that I count every one of those baby steps I was talking about. Put enough baby steps together and it makes a mile. My petite little granddaughter proved that the other day. Her legs are even shorter than mine - so she takes even smaller steps than I do. When she walked with me the other day, we just kept taking her size steps and sure enough; we walked more than a mile.

...

And these little jewels (accountability, baby steps and cumulative effect) work with words as well as with miles. I have observed these three things working toward my success in major writing projects for NaNoWriMo. Four times now I have cranked out "a novel" of 50,000 words during the month of November. True, they will probably never be published - at least not without a LOT more work! But I have used excerpts here and there and plan to do more with two of the books. But you know what? Even if I never publish a word, it was still a great experience and a great accomplishment. I built some awesome writing habits and I learned so very much in the process.

Once again I owe that success to having a support group, to typing just a few words at a time and to the power of those words adding up line by line by line, one day after another.

I am thankful that I am learning how to take advantage of these three concepts - accountability, baby steps and the cumulative effect - because I am really glad to finally have some successes in reaching my goals. Now that is cause for celebration!